Self awareness is a trait that is not talked about when we are young and in school. We are so busy trying to learn all of the details of a given subject that whether we are loud, messy, organized, or impatient it doesn’t matter in terms of what grade we will get in class.
As we mature and become more comfortable in life’s current, things are not taught to us explicitly any more. There are few direct answers to questions. There are no more simple questions but rather ones that have many nuances that change the answer to the one that is most relevant given the situation.
What starts off as a developed reflex (question then answer) becomes muddled and trickier as we age. We are thrown into a sea of thoughts and actions that may or may not be related. There no longer is someone that organizes our random encounters of everyday life into questions that then focuses our attention to answer.
It is now up to us to do the organizing that results in questions and then to invest the time, attention, and thought into seeking answers that are relevant. Over time, all of us develop this skill, well enough, to survive.
To thrive based on this skill is a different story. We tend to get in our own way. No understanding and not being self aware of who we are keeps us from seeing the best solution to a given situation. We get in our own way when we say “it’s them not me”.
We get in our own way when we treat a symptom of a problem as if it is a problem. The result are solutions we cling to that are weak and ineffective. When we don’t understand our contribution to a situation we place ourselves at a disadvantage.
This occurs when we hide behind “our” standards or values. It also occurs when we hide the fear we have, to face the real problem that intuitively we feel but have a difficult time making explicit.
Keep things simple. Become more self aware. Get out of your own way. And thrive.
Build up to this new future — one day at a time!