When hearing the phrase people builders, the first thought that comes to mind are teachers. For the first 20 years or so of our lives, all we do as children is learn so much from the adults around us. Quickly forgotten, we then begin our adult lives as if we know so much.
Parents would be the second most common people builders in the world. Tasked with the responsibility of nurturing their babies into adults. Filled with the tears, insecurities, playfulness and joys of childhood.
Less obvious, is the fact that each of us need to be people builders each day of our lives. What do you mean? How do we do this?
Because life is so fragile, we continually need each other to build ourselves up. Especially when we are down. Angry, disappointed or frustrated. Confused, uncertain, or stuck. Even when happy, joyful, emotional or irrational.
To be a people builder, we have to be patient, kind, generous, and optimistic. Listening with a keen ear to hear what is not said & feel what is deep inside the person near us. Using the power of presence to disarm our ego while silencing our own troubles, fears and frustrations to see others. For who they are & more importantly who they can be.
People building has a component of trial and error. Sometimes we are there for others but say the wrong thing. Other times we don’t make the extra calll or give the extra hug that someone desperately needs at this time. Many times, we don’t use the honest words that someone needs to build them up towards a different awareness where new found strength is born.
Training for skills is the smallest part of people building. The important work requires complete listening, abandoning our destructive nature of judgment, banishing negativity from our own soul so as not to push away others weary of our angst with life, and the patience to hear for the nth time things that now are evident to us in others.
Funny, all of this sounds like unconditional love. An aspiration that is difficult to achieve because we never can honestly see the vulnerability that our fears, faults & weaknesses create within us. Available to us in a mirror, but seldom seen or thought about as we rush through our lives.
Growing old without clearly understanding that we NEED each other, using our own unique people builder skills, to help us become better persons than we could have on our own.
Ignoring this fundamental truth, expands sadness, brings loneliness that entraps us with negativity, and leaves us weak from the lack of human connection that each of us desperately needs in order to thrive.