Tests and quizzes are a big part of school. Pick the right answer. Get a good grade. There always was only one right answer. Year after year it was always the same.
We get out of school and what do we do? We continue to look for the right answer. Of course, it’s habit. I’ve done it a million times. What I couldn’t figure out for a long time after leaving school was why did my “right answers” result in such poor results?
We spend hours, days, or months trying to decide what the right answer is for the “stuff” of our lives. And then “right” begins to transform itself into “perfect”. The perfect house, the perfect wedding, the perfect job.
Nothing on this earth is ever perfect. None of our lives. None of our friends’ lives. None of our superstars’ lives.
Life is very different. I am sad that it took me so long to see. How something FITS OUR SITUATION is the question we should be asking. “THIS IS THE OUTCOME THAT I WANT TO ACHIEVE” is what we should first be thinking. Yet sadly, we eat up the energy of our lives trying to figure out the right answer or the perfect choice only to be continually disappointed.
I’m sad because I found that there are always many possibilities that would work in a situation and that most were possibilities than I was never aware of.
My circle of friends was too small. My experiences too limited. I was asking the wrong questions. I was focusing on the wrong things.
Some possibilities, in the end, will be better than others. Given our situation. Given the outcome we would like to achieve. Given who we are. None of them are guaranteed to work. But we owe it to ourselves to always keep trying.
As I grow older, I wonder, when thinking about an outcome I would like to achieve, what don’t I know that will keep me from choosing wisely.