A trap that all of us fall into, many times, is what we do with our explanation of “who they are”. That moment in time where we define what we see in other people. It’s essentially our definition of them.
In and of itself, there is no harm in this. Where we get ourselves in trouble is with the creation of a second column on this list that is titled “who we want them to be”.
The trap in spending time on comparing who we want someone to be versus who they are is that it begins to turn us against the other person we are judging. This compounds itself in creating distance between us and our relationship with this other person deteriorates.
Accepting people for who they are means that there is no second column. It comes with the understanding that we cannot change others but only can control our own actions.
Unconditional love demands this of us. Always.